7.14.2013

Day 30: Inspiration

Sorry guys, I was in trouble as soon as I wrote centauricorn yesterday. The inspiration was unavoidable. I mean, look at all that majesty! It just can't not be done.


So I decided to do a google search on centaurs. You know what I found? Centaurs are hard core. You don't want to mess with centaurs. Why? Because they'll shoot at ANYTHING and they look awesome while doing it. Here are some of the pictures I found:


Look at this guy. Who hunts while performing ballet? Centaurs. 




And this guy. He FLIES. Ever heard of a pegacentaur? What can you even shoot at that high in the air? Pterodactyls. 





Check this one out. He's shooting at the ocean. The OCEAN. Why do centaurs shoot at oceans? Because they stop tidal waves. You're welcome, India.



Look at this guy. He's clearly shooting at a thunderstorm. Bleep you, thunderstorm, I don't feel like rain today! There is too much awesome in this picture.


So yeah, that's the end of drawing challenge #2. Hope you enjoyed the ride! 

7.13.2013

Day 29: Mythical Creature


As much as I wanted to draw something awesome like a centauricorn or some sort of green tiger-human with manga eyes, I ended up somewhere completely different. I have never even read about these mythical creatures:



Wealthy CEOs who have enough money
"I'll do fine on six figures. I think it's time for a business plan
that raises the quality of life for my employees!"





Logical preschoolers
"It's bad to run into oncoming traffic because cars will murder me."
"I will regret trying to jump on cats."




Dogs that scoop their own poop





Morality cat-callers

"Look at the integrity on that woman!"
"Hey baby, bet you could make a man like me real happy."



7.12.2013

Day 28: Favorite Song

There is one song that will always make me laugh.


Bless you, Wesley Willis.
Hear the song about whupping Batman here.

7.11.2013

Day 27: Silhouette

Today I let my environment inspire me. Included below are the silhouettes of:


A box
An egg
A refrigerator that desperately needs cleaning
A yellow cup
A plastic cup
A sippy cup full of spoiled milk
A spray bottle used to harass ants
A game cube game lying down
A game cube game standing up
A library book lying down that might have been nommed on by a baby when I wasn't looking
A shrink-wrapped package of meat
A television without a wii motion sensor because the adhesive isn't sticky anymore and it keeps falling behind the stand
A crumpled up bag of dog food
A wiggly three-year-old reading a book
A ball
Another ball claimed and loved by the dog

7.02.2013

Day 18: Favorite Animated Character



I've always been a TMNT fan, but Michelangelo in the new Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles on Nickelodeon is really fun to watch. I think it's a fine production.

6.30.2013

6.28.2013

Day 14: Favorite Book

I love Smile A Lot by Nancy Carlson.  My favorite part is the frog's grinny teeth. It's a children's book about dealing with everyday disappointments and looking on the bright side of the situation. For instance, "if your mom made oatmeal again for breakfast, smile a lot! Ask if you can help her make chocolate chip pancakes tomorrow. Then figure out what to do with your oatmeal." Nancy then illustrates the frog spoon-feeding the oatmeal to his younger sibling.


I thought the message applies well to adults too.




If you didn't make it through the last round of lay-offs,



Smile a lot! You'll probably eat better on food stamps anyway.






If that cute guy you really like "just isn't interested" in you,



Smile a lot! It turns out he has herpes.





If your school-aged children are making a scene at the store,



Smile a lot! Everybody is judging you for having not enough or too many children anyway.

It really is a good book. 

*disclaimer, none of these stock photos are mine. I stole them from the internet.


6.27.2013

Day 13: Something You Miss


So.

Growing up, I had a slight overbite and a few of my bottom teeth were a bit crowded, but nothing to call the fire department about.




My freshman year in high school it was decided that I should have braces. While my prognosis was nothing like Lisa Simpson's, the orthodontist recommended a palate expander. Allow me to explain what that is:


They stick a metal plate in the roof of your mouth (which is great for trapping bread, by the way, and you need a stick somewhere between  the size of a toothpick and a kitchen utensil to get it out), which is held aloft by thick, metal wires attached to cuffs around select teeth and arched across your mouth. Then a loving parent or trusted person will put you in a straight jacket, restrain your head, place a small "key" in the center of the metal plate and turn it a click or two, which forces the teeth apart with tremendous throbbing pressure. This also makes your teeth loose, which in turn makes it hard to process any food, let alone suck anything down, without reminding you that you are a victim of medieval torture. Also when you  can move past gingerly gumming food and finally bite something, it's time to turn that key again.


I'm not even going to try and illustrate that, so let a picture of Hitler suffice.



The best day of being in high school with braces was when the kid I had a swoony schoolgirl crush on came over to talk to me. It also happened to be immediately after I got back from the orthodontist appointment with a mouth full of new metal.

"Did you get braces?"



People with normal teeth can smile from start to finish. People 30 minutes into having braces on their teeth can smile, but then get stuck half way at the part where your lips have to close back down your face again.

"Yes." Blush.
0%....50%...

...50%....


...51%


FINISH!





That was awesome.

In the end, braces changed my life and affected my self-esteem more than I ever imagined they would:


Speaking


Relaxing


Sleeping





I miss my old mouth.

6.26.2013

Day 12: Something Green

Grouches are green




Legos are green




Snot is green




Happy clovers are green




Sick clovers are green too.